This morning as i was driving to my doctors appointment i began praying, and i simply asked God for the doctors to be able to tell me what was wrong with me. Since giving birth to Ryder i have had pain, and with moving i just never went back to the doctor. Walking into the office i saw all these pregnant women, and i began to have flash backs of when i was pregnant with Ryder. I love my son very much, but let's just say he is an unplanned blessing. With that being said i did not enjoy my pregnancy, i was full of shame, and felt like i had let my parents down. I have forgave myself, and i have faith i will one day use my journey of getting pregnant to touch many lives through my testimony. I believe everything happens for a reason, and I've learned no matter what we do God is still with us. No matter how far we run, God will never leave us. Okay, back to the doctors appointment, turns out i have a muscle disorder, which praise God no serious problem; but it can be very hard to treat. As the doctor tells me this i begin to cry tears of fear. Leaving with directions to follow the next to weeks to see if it will help i felt so hopeless. I ask each of you to pray with me that my doctor will find research on what else can be done to help relieve my pain. I have so much to be thankful for and even though it could be worse, i want relief. God is constant even when we feel there is no hope. Happy Wednesday everyone!
